Are you one of those people who always know what is going to happen to people around you? Who always know perfectly that people are going to fail, fall or suffer a lot from the biggest pain in life? Let me ask you: have you ever won the lottery or something like that? No? Then, please, leave your crystal ball aside. (And even if you won the lottery, nobody needs to have their future determined by a prediction, let’s build our own destiny, please)
You’ll surely have met them, and even I can risk to say that maybe you are surrounded by them (at least, a little group). They are the CFT (Catastrophe-Fortune-Tellers). I have met some during my life. Have some of them around me. At a safety distance, I confess. No, they don’t like keeping the distance. I do it. For them, and mainly, for me.
I’m not a normal girl, I know it, and I’m proud of it. And when you are like that, you attract the CFT’s like flies to honey. Yes. You are not standard, you don’t follow the rules (at least, the ones that they think you have to follow). You don’t settle. You want more from life, you are not afraid to go further, to work more, to pursue what you dream of. They don’t. Because they have a crystal ball. And they believe firmly in what it tells to them. So they don’t work “the extra mile” or do anything different to what they are supposed to. Because the crystal ball tells them that when people do that, they fail. So they don’t even try.
According to them, you are going to fail, get even fatter, never going to find a boyfriend/girlfriend, be alone (and die alone), no one is going to love you (like ever), and whatever effort you put on building a different life, away from standard, is just going to help you to be poor, depressed, and almost suicidal, and people are going to hate you, and leave you aside.
Why do I know it? Because I have been predicted to suffer from all of them (well, almost all of them, the “suicidal” one has never got to that point, but almost…). Since I was a little girl, I had to follow some rules (set by family, school, society, friends, environment…). The more I grew up, and the more I questioned the basic rules of the world, the more predictions I got (and believe me, I still get them nowadays, and from people who are close to me).
Does it sound familiar? Then, welcome to my world. I feel you. You live in a world where stepping out of the standard road isn’t right. It’s going to lead you to dangerous and lonely places. Yes, maybe. But only at the beginning.
We are sick and tired of seeing people follow certain paths. We know how it’s made. And we are not willing to do that. We want something different. Yes, it’s the famous “path less traveled”, as Robert Frost says in his poem “The Road Not Taken”:
“[…] I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
The choice is yours. You know where the “standard path” leads to (yes, a crowded, smelly and noisy place). And you know what happens when you follow your own, unique path. Yes, the CFT’s are going to surround you and try to make you change your mind. But you must think about yourself and what you really want.
What will happen when you are 98 years and look back at your life?
Will you feel satisfied because of having lived as you liked or because of having followed anybody else’s advice?
Do you want a life by default or a life consciously lived?
Do you want to be yourself or just someone else’s idea of what you have to be?
Believe me, there are lots of people around the world who can’t wait to meet you. Kind people. Tolerant ones. Brave ones. The ones that support, help, are happy when you win and are willing to give a helping hand when things get rough. Find them, and surround yourself with a lot of them. The more of them you surround yourself with, the better. Leave CFT’s aside, at a good distance. Visit them whenever you need it if they are family and/or friends and you can’t help it. But set limits. Show them what you are not going to allow. And believe me, your acts and successes will prove your point.
What do I tell the CFT’s? I just tell them, like Meghan Trainor’s song: “Thank you in advance […] You need to let it go” My life, my mistakes, my rules. And my successes, obviously. The greatest and most celebrated ones. And the most well deserved.
(Note: For your peace of mind, none of the CFT’s predictions has come true. I’m not alone, people love me, I have a boyfriend (almost husband), and I’m changing my life, according to my dreams, and not to someone else’s predictions.)
Plenty of CFT’s around you? Don’t worry! Learn to set limits and find your tribe! Don’t know how? Just meet your tribe of supporters and accountability partners in the “B.U. Offbeats Club”. Your tribe is willing to meet you!